profile
entries
empty space
links
in the south china sea
joscelyn heng,22, peace love and karate punch!
views
happy birthday mommy
i go to school every single day
things are not so bad after all
is that on purpose?
This is not the end
This is not the beginning,
Just a voice like a riot
Rocking every revision
But you listen to the tone
And the violet rhythm
Though the words sound steady
Something empty's within 'em
We say Yeah!
With fists flying up in the air
Like we're holding onto something
Thats invisible there,
Cuz we're living at the mercy of
The pain and the fear
Until we dead it, Forget it,
Let it all dissapear.
Waiting for the end to come
Wishing I had strength to stand
This is not what I had planned
It's out of my control....
Flying at the speed of light
Thoughts we're spinning in my head
So many things were left unsaid
It's hard to let you go...
(Oh!) I know what it takes to move on,
I know how it feels to lie,
All I wanna do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what I haven't got
Sitting in an empty room
Trying to forget the past
This was never meant to last,
I wish it wasn't so...
(Oh!) I know what it takes to move on,
I know how it feels to lie,
All I wanna do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what I haven't got
What was left when that fire was gone?
I thought it felt right but that right was wrong
All caught up in the eye of the storm
And trying to figure out what it's like moving on
And i don't even know what kind of things I've said
My mouth kept moving and my mind went dead
So, picking up the pieces, now where to begin?
The hardest part of ending Is starting again!!
All I wanna do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what i haven't got...
This is not the end
This is not the beginning,
Just a voice like a riot
Rocking every revision
But you listen to the tone
And the violet rhythm
Though the words sound steady
Something empty's within 'em
(Holding on to what i haven't got)
We say Yeah!
With fists flying up in the air
Like we're holding onto something
Thats invisible there,
Coz we're living at the mercy of
The pain and th fear
Until we dead it, Forget it,
Let it all dissapear
(Holding on to what i haven't got!)
waiting for the end by linkin park is currently my pick
a month ago
smtimes its hard to walk away.
I AM SO FREAKING STICKY AND HOT!
hmm
very distracted yknow
This has got to be the best holiday everrrrrr
today i got a call from gx and ms sherlyn
tday was really awesome
hmm,k faster finish v then go sleep!
:( my name is jos
i dont feel good
i miss feeling loved and going out jalanjalan
but i learnt smthg from all this,
i feel very insecure when you say its over
today was damn boring
woah its four plus alr
today is going well
its always good to try smthg new
Joscelyn Adrienne Heng
Create Your Badge
11:59 PM
Saturday, October 30, 2010
i think im sending wrong signals.
so guilty,but its gradual.(i think)
ashton going on monday
im gna miss him,
beezee siaaa.
but i just stone.
my parents shouldnt have bought this house with a
mirror opposite the dining table.
all i do is stare right at it most of the time.
hopefully tmr evening will be fun
fyi tails not done yet,
i got no mood to start painting it.
happy halloween yall.
12:34 PM
happy birthday mommy11:32 PM
Thursday, October 28, 2010
and i leave school after 6
its so busy yet so much fun!
im feeling gr8,so awesome,its amazing
i love my powerpuff girls!
i love my classmates
everything &everyone ard me is just amazing
see its not that bad huh
shall bomb pics soon!
not now
im tiredddd
12:05 AM
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
ive been so busy w sch work,
have got no extra time to worry/cry about anything else
heehee life is good (and busy)
but well,there are still times i still think abt you,
but its alright.
:-)
god bless the broken hearts.
1:25 AM
Monday, October 25, 2010
srsly,you can do better than tht.
fidy i also wish im as noble as you to delete my fb acct,
but i cannot bear to do it.
i had a gr8 weekend btw
:)
5:31 PM
Saturday, October 23, 2010
This is not the beginning,
Just a voice like a riot
Rocking every revision
But you listen to the tone
And the violet rhythm
Though the words sound steady
Something empty's within 'em
We say Yeah!
With fists flying up in the air
Like we're holding onto something
Thats invisible there,
Cuz we're living at the mercy of
The pain and the fear
Until we dead it, Forget it,
Let it all dissapear.
Waiting for the end to come
Wishing I had strength to stand
This is not what I had planned
It's out of my control....
Flying at the speed of light
Thoughts we're spinning in my head
So many things were left unsaid
It's hard to let you go...
(Oh!) I know what it takes to move on,
I know how it feels to lie,
All I wanna do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what I haven't got
Sitting in an empty room
Trying to forget the past
This was never meant to last,
I wish it wasn't so...
(Oh!) I know what it takes to move on,
I know how it feels to lie,
All I wanna do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what I haven't got
What was left when that fire was gone?
I thought it felt right but that right was wrong
All caught up in the eye of the storm
And trying to figure out what it's like moving on
And i don't even know what kind of things I've said
My mouth kept moving and my mind went dead
So, picking up the pieces, now where to begin?
The hardest part of ending Is starting again!!
All I wanna do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what i haven't got...
This is not the end
This is not the beginning,
Just a voice like a riot
Rocking every revision
But you listen to the tone
And the violet rhythm
Though the words sound steady
Something empty's within 'em
(Holding on to what i haven't got)
We say Yeah!
With fists flying up in the air
Like we're holding onto something
Thats invisible there,
Coz we're living at the mercy of
The pain and th fear
Until we dead it, Forget it,
Let it all dissapear
(Holding on to what i haven't got!)
4:56 PM
for song of the week.
ytd night after soccer i had another mini breakdown,
luckily there was seanboy,and the tauhuay & the company tt made me
loosen up a bit.joined my dad and bro in triple 8 for awhile .
thank goodness i have sharz&fidyminah for the whole of ytd
we had h2h talk even with all the drilling and loud annoying construction noises in koufu
damn funny! love my girls,if reggie &tikah was there,it would have been nice.
we had web,it was my first class this sem so i was kinda excited!
the whole day i was carrying my really awful eye bags,couldnt wait to go home and hide.
urgh. i knocked out completely and was an hr late for soccer,
soccer was therapeutic, i felt really good abt myself.
thats a start...
today is a good day!
i had cat class
i love the kids they are so smart
was w danny while waiting for my mum to finish her things in church
went for family lunch at northpoint before my dad went to the airport to the usa for the week
sighhh he's away much often now. cant wait for next sun when he comes back
we're gna pick him up!
booked my driving lessons for next week
and now im home and my balcony is flooded.
heh, thank you rmbering me.
so tempted to take a nap siaaaaa.
tonight watch movie somemore!
:)
11:15 PM
Thursday, October 21, 2010
(thkyou for the ariel pin and the princess charm bracelet,the last pretty item you bought for me)
i feel like shit
i cannot do this alone
just 10 minutes ago i've decided to fall into temptation,put down my freaking pride
& gave him a call to ask him, if i nvr call you,you wont call or txt me right?
he said: friends dont call.
wtf :(
its not fair! i have to initate first,or not he wont.
he's having the time of his life,but im not.
he's doesnt care now?
he's with his friends and he asked if he can put down!
oh btw.he smokes(yucks)
im dying yknow,i may seem fine and happy on the outside
but ard 11-12midnight i breakdown every single night.
im not used this.
seeing everyone ard me w their loved ones being so nice to each other,
i also feel like shit uh.
like what he always says,i dont love him,but i need him to get made used of.
its the sad truth.
so im at fault right?
smtimes i feel better cause my friend will
call,but its different,
that happiness will only last for awhile.
5:18 PM
11:05 PM
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
JUST GOT HOME AFTER A LONG IMPT DAY OUT!
BEST... no one at home
when i need company nobody seems to be there.
nowadays i post more,because only blogger bothers to hear me.
i've been on the phone much lesser,
i spend more time by myself which is so sad.
the minute i walked out of home tday,
my dear feet hurt so badly because of my killer heels
we arrived much earlier and presented earlier than the allocated time
afterwards we went so excited cause we planned to spend two hours in a hotel room
doing nonsense stuff which didnt happen in the end
went to town,ate just acia,caught a glimpse of you,thank goodness i was a street away,
i didnt wanna walk directly past you cause it will be so awkward.
i had so much fun w zak dan gk randy& jasmine.
we tried so many hotels in chinatown but they didnt have hourly rates :/
so we passed time at coral village eating place,met up w tikah,adam and siyang.
went to duxton to pass more time and finally the moment we were all waiting for,
the damn results.
dinner was too highclass for me haha,we had italian,
(i rmbed two yrs ago,my family went to a place similar to this before)
results were announced while i was squeezing dan's fingers so scary.
we got second, x box yo! dayummmmm
hmm,i got no feeling la.
currently im just happy to be home from all the walking
and i woke up so early today.
today i asked my friends if they prefer going to sch everyday or like have 3 lessons a week.
now i would wanna go sch everyday
but if you ask me a year ago, i'd definately choose the other option.
i need to occupy myself
or not ....
yeah,you know.
im going brokeeeee urghhh
just bought rubi shoes tday,and hundred bucks worth of clothes on asos sale.
dayummmmm.
10:32 PM
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
hmmgg crazy?
1:52 AM
why am i like that uh
11:01 PM
Monday, October 18, 2010
tonight sucks
i must try to move on
i must try to move on
after being shouted at on the phone just now
i really hate you
you guys can play on w/o me,
since when was i impt on the court? wtf.
yeah last time you hardly write on my wall even after i bug you.
now you love writing on walls huh
1:56 PM
Sunday, October 17, 2010
ever since the start of the hols i've been so blessed.
so blessed to work at ivan's w gx zak&josephine
so blessed to have afc friends to meet up once in a while
so blessed to have got the chance to go kelong w the year2s
so blessed to have such wunderful friends around me
so blessed to have the opportunity to take my driving and have a nice instructor
so blessed to have improvements in my results,
so blessed to have a brother to share the same hols and do things tgt,
i did not make it happen alone.
thankyou lord.
the last sat of my break i had so much fun!
i went to my godfamily's house
they have a dog named happy,oh hes adorable
played badminton,watch spongebob marathon and karate kid with them
i love jane she is so special!
had dinner with them before they send me bk home to prepare for lex's special 21st!
lexine's bday party,im sure she had the time of her life,everything was lovely
and i am so glad she enjoyed herself,we all did too!
after clearing up,we wenta joel's house,had mac breakfast and then yellow for a while,
i cant wait to bathe and go for mass ltr.
its time to throw the chillax mindset & get ready for the final lap of poly!
ah shucks
my hands stuck
i dont know what to reply.
boys like girls muzic the bomb,no?
12:36 AM
Friday, October 15, 2010
right after my nose bled
its was abt zed academy,
i hope we all do our very bestest!
tday after drivning.i waited for bacon and lex at admiralty,
yeah loner man sit there alone play iphone.
bugis is like paradise! better than blogshopping la!
lex did her nails while bac and i walked ard.
....
met ant after his work and went back tgt.
fidy,thks for your kok philosophy ;)
cant wait for halloween!
ken n i gna dress as avatar jengjengjeng!
2:06 AM
Thursday, October 14, 2010
i went for driving,watched charlie st cloud with didi mcboy
got to stare at zac efron for one&a half hours
we took the longest of time eating at banquet
thankyou it was all very fun!
when i reached home,stomach pain agn. :/
dozed off at the couch till 12 plus
caught up with g on the phone,
it kinda hit me,this is really it.no more second chances like always.
it was all good,very different but good.
you will always be my special friend and i thank god for you
it all happened too fast
but like what zoso said,time will heal all wounds and it will only make me stronger.
sucha crybaby sigh
things are so different right now
dk if its a good thing la :)
k gna wash dishes now
i shd be glad you're still in my life
:)
goodnight xoxo
1:08 AM
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
hmm,k faster finish v then go sleep!
tmr i got plans yay!
so sexciting i going wildwildwet w my godfamily this sat!
wow,shit la my flabs where to hide siallll
12:31 AM
ginger no more
he changed my name to jos.
hmm jos, i might get use to it.
1:37 AM
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
everyday i got issues with my tummy
dammit it hates me
wrong body to be in
i suspect its small intestiine smthg smthg
if its serious must go surgery one siol
woah i dont wanna find out
cause the truth hurts.
very painnnnnnn!
urgh tahan only.
12:38 AM
urghhhhh
sean has maria to take him out
i got nobody to bring me out anymore
i miss all the fun times we had
now you're just so cold & grouchy,you cant stand the sight of me.
im sucha lozer.
wl want cry alr uh
11:08 PM
Thursday, October 07, 2010
this weekend would be fun i think
so many birthdays!
and lex's 21st next week
like cool only
i wanna dress like a true retro diva
but i dont know how and where to get the outfit
suggestions?
the kids drive me up the wall smtimes
but its fun bullying them,
they actually make me laugh till i turn tomato-ish.
1:24 AM
from this relationship
it should not always be about me
1:04 AM
i feel very insecure when you say its over
all this while i realize i cannot be without you
and i always want you back
(not sure if this is love but)
because you make me feel safe
you make me feel like everythings gonna be okay
you provide everything that i ask for which is damn bitch la
for 2 years and 10 months you build that up for me
even if everyone hates me i will still be okay
because i can always fall back on you to give me all the love in the world
and i am so glad that you did
i on the other hand didnt do the same
ive been taking and taking and taking
and i give very little back.
i snide,hurt and criticize
like there was no end to it.
when you always hit your lowest i was nvr there
and im sorry.
maybe this change is good yknow
not for the both of us,but for you.
im so sorry babe.
10:56 PM
Wednesday, October 06, 2010
i ate alone
mostly i watched home&health alone
talk to myself
play w my phone alone
procrastinate on my work (sigh)
yeah
& my love cup is so empty right now
1:17 PM
i feel like the villain last night
& i still dunt know what i want
you are right, i have always been like that
and you shd really h8 me
am i the only one whos really bad at this game
today is stay home alone& do work day
yeah it adds on to my misery huh
4:18 PM
Tuesday, October 05, 2010
i got my first driving lesson at 5.55 later on
not very excited leh think i'll doze on & off heh heh
think i woke up later than usual today
saw dan's text msg about results
panick siaaaa i scared my gpa drop or what.
went to check, it was quite easy cause only got 2 modules
at least i finally reach 3 finally!!!
its my dream yknow i tell it to everybody i know
finally hit 3 i am so happy
good things keep happening since sunday
thank you lord for everything
still in disbelieve abt everything
cant wait for school to start final lap!
i want to improve!
went for lunch w my dad again
half way my stomach pain again.
always yknow
smtimes i wonder why i go out so much for what
just stay at home 24 7
cause i always have stomach problems
i also dont see myself getting skinnier shitzzz.
my skins not getting any better.
4:28 PM
Monday, October 04, 2010
its like suddenly
everything wonderful just keeps coming
i finished my bumper but got improvements to do
i had jap for lunch w my daddy
i got a new iphone 4 omg dzsdfffufufzvvfuhhyo
so not expecting it,dad just said to go singtel shop to check if my line is time for renewal.
but i wasnt even sure of getting it,cause marcus said not worth getting.
it just... came.
i dont even know how to use it,
so scared of handling it.
holymoly
& then after months of procrastinating on my driving,
we went to ssdc and enrolled me in driving school,
booked 6 lessons for the next 2 weeks in one shots.
its a whole lot of moolah spent by my dad for me today
i feel baddddd but so happy
some action for my driving is finally taking place.
thank you so much dad,
its not even my birthday
okay,gonna meet bac &sean now
we cant jog cause its raining man hallelujah!
12:33 PM
it all seems clear now.
glad dad's back,
its like marcus goes
and he comes back.
we gna have sushi for lunch!
5:34 PM
Sunday, October 03, 2010
1:14 AM
its always good to try smthg new
learn new skills huhhhh
i tried cross processing in ps
after seeing sid's kelong pictures all like awesum only
but very time consuming huh,
must adjust one by one
wahhh respect.
marcus left for hk this morning
i miss him alr
i miss him helping me stay out later.
i miss him talking some sense to my mum
i miss him la.
this evening we went to peperoni's
for ken&ben's bday celeb!
the pizza so humongous and delicious
we swept up 3 large family sized pizza in 15 mins
it was thattttt fast!
aw man i wanna go bk again,
best pizzas everrrrrrr
love you guys.
so so much.
Joscelyn Adrienne Heng
Create Your Badge
atikah d
daniel ferly
feedee l
marcus
parables
randy
regina
lexine
zac
photos;
parablesalbum1
parablesalbum2
past;
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010
March 2010
April 2010
May 2010
June 2010
July 2010
August 2010
September 2010
October 2010
November 2010
December 2010
January 2011
February 2011
March 2011
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
September 2011
October 2011
November 2011
December 2011
January 2012
February 2012
March 2012
April 2012
May 2012
June 2012
July 2012
August 2012
September 2012
October 2012
November 2012
December 2012
January 2013
April 2013
May 2013
July 2013
August 2013
September 2013
October 2013
November 2013
December 2013
January 2014
February 2014
April 2014
May 2014
December 2014
June 2016
July 2018
April 2019
daniel ferly
feedee l
marcus
parables
randy
regina
lexine
zac
photos;
parablesalbum1
parablesalbum2
past;
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010
March 2010
April 2010
May 2010
June 2010
July 2010
August 2010
September 2010
October 2010
November 2010
December 2010
January 2011
February 2011
March 2011
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
September 2011
October 2011
November 2011
December 2011
January 2012
February 2012
March 2012
April 2012
May 2012
June 2012
July 2012
August 2012
September 2012
October 2012
November 2012
December 2012
January 2013
April 2013
May 2013
July 2013
August 2013
September 2013
October 2013
November 2013
December 2013
January 2014
February 2014
April 2014
May 2014
December 2014
June 2016
July 2018
April 2019